Married Life


This photo was taken when Mike and I were new parents and married a little over 4 years. It hangs in our living room and holds such happy memories for us. As happy as we have been for the past 12 years and continue to be, we have many friends in our extended circle that are facing an end to their marriage. For this my heart aches.

This morning I sat in a courthouse hallway along with a dozen others waiting to testify as a character witness for a custody hearing. A friend of mine is entering into a difficult divorce and what looks to be a bitter custody battle. It is gut wrenching to see what is happening to this family because of choices. Because of feelings. Because of detachment over the years. Because of alienation. Because love is lost.

Mike and I have certainly had our fair share of ups and downs over the past 12 years. I vividly remember year 8 being a tough one...although year 5 wasn't a cake walk either. Its downright hard doing this thing called marriage, isn't it? To do it right it takes an enormous amount of work, a willingness to do self reflection often and be willing to change and adapt. It takes alot of forgiveness and a huge slice of humble pie.
But thankfully the good has definitely outweighed the bad in our relationship and we are deeply in love and ridiculously giddy about each other. This is not to say we don't have our days...we do. Plenty of them. But we have learned and continue to learn the art of quickly forgiving and forgetting. Life is too short to hold grudges and stay mad.
I listened to a fantastic podcast this week from the author of "Kiss Me Like You Mean It". It's a 2 part talk and I would highly recommend a listen whether you are married or not, happy in marriage or not. Its really good.
You can find part one here and part two here.
Sorry for the heavy post today. I had planned on sharing lots of fun things happening over this way...more puzzles, marshmallows and crafts.
I'll share more about that next week.

5 comments:

  1. We too see friends struggling through divorce and it makes us dig our heels in harder, determined to keep on through the tough times and enjoy all of the many good times! Thanks for the post.

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  2. We've been married 42 years and this past year we lost our youngest daughter to breast cancer. I don't think there's anything worse to go through than losing a child, but I know we have each other to hold on to and we'll be okay.
    If you're lucky enough to have that person, be thankful. xoxo

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  3. Never apologize for it not being all happy-go-lucky. It's a rough thing, especially with everything else going on.

    That's a fantastic photo of you guys. And you're right. This marriage gig is hard, but with the right people and the right commitment it is an amazing thing.

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  4. This photo is INCREDIBLE! I love it, I also love the honest and heartwarming description of your marriage and life. Sometimes I feel like I read blogs and people post photos of their husbands/family/boyfrieds etc and it's ALL happy go lucky, which is great and all, but not real. I really appreciate your post, thank you for sharing ;)

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  5. I remember that photo from before - just as cool now. Good post. Marriage is hard - I had no idea how hard until being married, but you are right - so worth it. Especially in those good years. :)

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